“You guys let me know. I’m free.”

This week a friend who knew an older version of me reached out after a decade.

She said she was randomly reminded of me today and decided to text. I smiled the moment I read it. It genuinely made my day.

There is something incredibly comforting about talking to someone who knew you before life became… life.

We spoke about the good old days, the people we were still in touch with, where life had taken us and somehow despite all these years, the conversation felt effortless. We shared pictures back and forth of each other’s lives.

That’s when it hit us how much life had changed. Our conversations had gone from reaching class on time and studying for exams to work schedules, responsibilities, parents growing older, partners and spouses, children and the different lives each of us had built.

One conversation led to another and before long we were planning a catch-up. As we discussed where to meet and when to meet, she said, “You guys are so busy with work, you guys let me know what time is convenient for you, I am free all the time, I will be there.”

I stopped her immediately and said, “What you do is every bit as difficult and sometimes even more difficult than what the others do. So please don’t ever say that about yourself again.”

She paused and said, “Nobody has ever told me that before. You’re the first person to say this to me… and it means a lot. You made me feel understood.”

That’s when it hit me.

It’s the 2020s for duck’s sake and yet so many homemakers and full-time mothers still feel the need to apologise for what they do or make it sound like it doesn’t count.

Why?

Maybe because somewhere along the way, we started believing that if something isn’t paid, it isn’t work.

And that couldn’t be further from the truth.

Running a home is work.

Raising children is work.

Carrying the invisible mental load every single day is work.

Just because it doesn’t come with appraisals, promotions or a salary credit at the end of the month doesn’t make it any less valuable.

So if you know someone who is a homemaker or a full-time mom, remind them that what they do matters.

Tell them they deserve appreciation too.

Tell them they don’t have to minimise their contribution just because the world doesn’t always acknowledge it.

Because this world belongs to everyone….

And… everyone’s contribution belongs here equally.